Option Counseling

I read this over at OffbeatMama.com and thought it was germane to the blog.

I’m not an abortion counsellor — I’m an options counsellor. That means I help you explore all your options. Every single one. Parenting, abortion, and adoption. None is off-limits unless you want them to be. I can’t make the decision for you. I can only guide you on the path to the right choice for you. You alone have the right to make the decision, and I know this can also be a huge responsibility that weighs heavily on your shoulders.

I never judge you. Ever. I met you an hour ago. I have no right to make decisions about your life. But I can support you every step of the way. I give you a safe space to talk, explore your feelings, ask questions, cry even, and hopefully, help you come to peace with your decision, whatever it may be.

I love reassuring you there is no correct way to feel. That you are normal. That you’re not selfish or crazy. I love bursting the myths you’ve been bombarded with — that single parents are feckless and lazy, that only uncaring people choose adoption or that abortion causes breast cancer.

I hate that I can’t rescue you from the situation you’re in. Some women know instantly what they need to do. For others, there is no easy answer. And sometimes, life feels so very unfair. Women who desperately want to parent but whose partner will leave them if they do, whose parents will kick them out or who know they cannot raise a child with severe disabilities. Women who want to choose abortion but feel they don’t deserve one, fear their partner will become violent if they do, or know we judge so terribly women who chose abortion.

Not once, never, have I thought “I know what you should do.” If your decision was easy, you wouldn’t be sitting in front of me. No woman’s choice is the same. No woman’s life is the same as another’s.

I’m so glad that there are people like this. Each family has to make its own decision about their family. If you would like to talk through your options, please contact an Options Counselor in your area.

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One thought on “Option Counseling

  1. Pingback: My Favorite Adoption-Related Posts of 2012 « The Chittister Family

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