I read this article on the NanaDays blog about adult adoptees and I wanted to know if anyone had any insight into the matter. She has pasted a comment from the New York Times Motherlode article entitled “Adoption, Destiny and Magical Thinking.” that reads:
“Because adoption has become more about finding babies for couples wanting to adopt instead of finding families for children truly in need, we have come to the point where the concern is centered more on adoptive parents than children.”
I read a LOT of blogs and things that say that adoption is wrong and that families that are looking to adopt are bad people. Contrast that with this article from the New York Times that claims that the author:
” …. didn’t feel a strong bond with the parents who raised me, and I had anything but a happy childhood. My mother was overly sensitive; my father, ascetic. I was neither. I felt as if I were living with complete strangers. I suspect that my parents felt the same way.”
After she made contact with her biological parents she seemed ambivalent about them:
When I finally had time to take it all in, I felt like the result of a mishandled science experiment. I wondered what might have happened to me if I had been raised by my genetic parents. It seems unlikely that I would have ended up with the degree of ambition that I did, one that surpasses my modest genetic gifts. I was never that smart or talented, but I was scrappy and dogged, and I believed I was owed something. That seems ridiculous now. Family is the luck of the draw, and so is how you turn out.
So some think being adopted was horrible and some say it was … okay … I rarely find things saying that it was great and wonderful. I’m also wondering if these same feelings are true for those adopted from foster care. Obviously, some parents feel that their children were stolen from them by children’s welfare services but do children end up feeling the same way? Is this the best I can look forward to? Kid(s) that think we’re bad or okay or couldn’t care less?
Teenaged and adult adoptees: How do feel about being adopted?