Our toddler does a lot of parroting.
We wanted to have him tested to make sure that he didn’t have a cognitive delay. Two women showed up. One lady “played” with him and took notes. The other lady asked us questions. The one that played with him scored him higher than the question lady, but she said she’d change her scores to be more in line with the question lady. The “issues” they found were:
He doesn’t take off his shoes/socks.
He doesn’t take off his clothes.
He doesn’t feed himself using a spoon/fork.
He doesn’t hold his pencil like an adult.
I’m sure there were a few others but this was the bulk of what made them recommend services two times per week. It’s not that he can’t do these things, it’s that we don’t ask him to do those things. Her examples all revolved around shoes. For example, “Does he bring his shoes from another room when you ask him?”
I forgot that he does two-step commands when he cleans his room (pick up the pink triangle and put it in the toy box, please) and cleans up the mess he makes in the kitchen (honey, pick up that white, plastic thing and put it back in the drawer). He’d still be a bit behind but not as much as she thought. The lady that played with him noted that he was not doind some age-appropriate things but was doing things older than what was age-appropriate and was giving him credit for those things but said in front of us that she’d change her assessment to fit the other lady’s assessment. *blank stare*
He can take off his shirt and feed himself, I just don’t have the patience to wait so he doesn’t do it often. Yesterday, I had him take off his socks just to see if he could …. of course he can. Since we were on a roll, we taught him to do more two-step commands (come get this paper and put it in the trash, please). I think I’ll try three-step commands next week.
She kept talking about skills he’ll need in pre-school and skills he’ll need in kinder … I didn’t wanna get into how I feel about public school so I didn’t say anything but … this assessment made me remember why I’m not feeling the public school system. She didn’t take into account that he knows how to count from ZERO to 10, knows six colors, knows three shapes, and can turn the lights on and off. Once she asked if he does three-step commands and we said, “No” it was over.
I WILL make an effort to let him do more things for himself and find a once-per-week pre-school co-op so we can grow his skills but you know what? I don’t feel badly anymore (I cried all day yesterday). We’re a different family with a different set of expectations.He’s a smart, kind kid that is patient (he sits through 13 hour flights like a champ!), fun (he loves to laugh), and energetic (he loves to run and play).
I thought about these things and then I wondered … what if he didn’t learn to bring his shoes until he was 3 … what difference would that make in the larger scheme of things? Perhaps I’m wrong and this would lead him down of the path of not being able to read and then getting in fights and then jail …. but probably not.
I don’t plan on putting my kid on the school conveyor belt and I feel pretty good about that.