“Didn’t Know You Married a Zulu Warrior”: When South African Tourism Goes Wrong

White chiefs in Ghana ....  now white Zulus?

White chiefs in Ghana …. now white Zulus?

I’m in Chicago listening to a classic rock station and every few hours I hear a commercial to promote South African tourism that makes me shake my head. The commercial wasn’t making me want to travel to South Africa anyway, but then I hear:

VERY WHITE SOUNDING MAN: You know, you really impressed me when you joined the Soweto Street Party and learned the latest local dances.
VERY WHITE SOUNDING WOMAN: You weren’t so bad yourself. I didn’t know you had moves like that.
VERY WHITE SOUNDING MAN: You didn’t know you married a Zulu Warrior, did you?


I wanted to know more so I Googled the commercial and found this great post about it from a few years ago. It turns out that this commercial was made on the show The Apprentice. I copied the transcript from a post that lays out the problem more clearly than I can. Read the post here. Ugh ….

Nurse With Funky Attitude

ab35034.jpgToday He took the baby to the doctor. The first time we went, everyone was really nice. This time ….

He went alone because I had a gig. He told me that:

  • They told him that he didn’t have an appointment.
  • Tried to make him fill out the new patient registration again.
  • Asked him where the mother was. When he responded that I was at work, she made a face and walked out.
  • Didn’t seem to care that the baby was cold when asked if He could wait a bit to undress him.

I’m glad that I wasn’t there because it might have gotten ugly. I’m pretty easy going in general. I believe that life is full of white water and you have to ride the current ….. but don’t mess with my family. I’m upset for Him and I’m upset at the way that the baby was treated.

He said that when the doctor arrived, she remembered him right away and told him not to worry about anything .. .she’d take care of it. Then the nurse we like swung by just to say hi. THAT’S the kind of service we expected.

I like the doctor, but that kind of behavior from the nurse is unacceptable. I’m thinking about writing the doctor a letter. Any ideas of how to handle it?



Babies + Comic Con = Cos play?

This is the first year that we’ve been able to score tickets to Comic Con in San Diego. We bought the tickets back in February way before we were matched. Since kids under 12 get in free, we’ll be taking the baby with us.

I look online to find tips for taking babies and found this and this. I appreciate reading the tips and it also ignited an interest in doing cos play with the baby! By the time July rolls around he’ll be almost four months old so I’m thinking …. onsie with a cape … or something … but … have you seen these? Ka-yute!


Any ideas? What should he wear to Comic Con?


Property Management Company UPDATE

facepalm_impliedThis is driving me crazy!

Today our adoption worker came over to see the new house so she could complete her home study …. again. She said that our home study should be done within the next two weeks and everything should be done within the month! Yay!

…. but no …

This morning CCL sent our property management company an email:

I am the licensing analyst for foster homes in [redacted] and I inspected the new home of [redacted] on March 7, 2014 and informed her that before I could license her home at [redacted], my department needed to have something in writing stating that the management company/landlord was okay with her bringing children onto the property for foster/adoption purposes.  If you can respond to this email and let me know that bringing children onto the property is okay, that would suffice.  If you have any questions, please feel free to call me.

Seems simple, no?


This is the response she received:

[redacted] must first have proof of  Liability Insurance  before [redacted] can become license and or foster / adoption



I already have liability insurance through my business.  I hope that’s what she’s talking about because at this point … I have no idea what they want. It went from, “Congratulations, we can not sign your letter, but [redacted] can do a walk through inspection of the property please call or email  for an appointment” to “must first have proof of liability insurance”? Those two things have nothing to do with each other and neither of them has anything to do with people that rent having kids …..

This is the email I sent:

I have liability insurance through my company, [redacted]. Is that what you’re talking about?

My policy is attached.

Let’s see what the next barrel of bs will be ….


London Adoptive Mother Forces Teen Daughter to Get Pregnant

I just read about this on Madame Nior. It’s a case about an adoptive mother that adopted three kids. When she couldn’t adopt a fourth kid, she forced her daughter to carry a baby for her.

Reading this is so sad:

The daughter told investigators she was pretty shocked when her mother asked her to willingly get pregnant but also thought, “if I do this … maybe she will love me more.” She also said “feelings of gratitude for my adoption influenced how I behaved.”

Wanna know what’s worse:

Over the years there were several instances where the authorities and child welfare services were called out to the house when neighbors complained of the mother’s inappropriate behavior toward the children like cussing them out, isolating them from peers and leaving them in the home alone while she was being treated in the hospital for a month.

Each time, the authorities found that there was no cause for concern.

The girl finally got some help:

The mother’s evil and selfish plot was only discovered after midwives reported her aggressive and insensitive behavior during her daughter’s labor. The midwives say that mother tried to prevent the daughter from breastfeeding the baby saying, “we don’t want any of that attachment thing.” They also noticed how the daughter hesitated when handing the baby over to her mother. They called child protective services when the mother attempted to remove the baby from the ward.

Thank goodness the woman is now serving jail time. She obviously has some crazy shit going on mental health issues. Ugh.

The story really reminds me of the Law & Order: SVU episode where a mother had sex with two men, “collected” their sperm and used it to inseminate her daughter so the family could have more children. Remember that one? I guess life does sometimes imitate art … and all these years I was hoping that those stories were coming from someone’s mind …. and not the news …. the world we live in. SMH



Stellaluna: One of the Ugliest Books for Children I’ve Ever Read

This book is NOT a good book for children to read.

This book is NOT a good book for children to read.

While on our adoption journey, we’ve been searching for books about foster care, adoption and family to add to our collection of children’s books. Somehow I came across a book about a baby bat named Stellaluna.

The short version is this:

Baby bat, Stellaluna, falls from mother’s embrace when mother is attacked by an owl.

Stellaluna is taken care of by a bird and her 3 baby birds.

Stellaluna’s ways are different than the ways of the birds. One day the mother bird yells at her, “You are teaching my children to do bad things”.

Stellaluna tries really hard to do things the way that the mother bird wants.

One day the birds and Stellaluna are flying. Stellaluna flies a bit further ahead and the baby birds leave her.

She is found by a group of bats. The bats assure her that she is not “bad”.

Her mother is in the group. They are reunited and she feels whole again.

Wow. You’d have to read it yourself to get the full understanding. I was reading a long … la … la ..la … and then … I felt bad for Stellaluna for getting yelled at for being herself. I felt bad for the baby birds that were open to Stellaluna’s different ways and were shut down. I felt angry at the mother bird for responding that way. Ugh.

I just found this book at the thrift store. I can’t decide whether to re-donate it or burn it. No child should have to read this. Talk about intolerance.