I don’t understand when people tell us (the parents) that our kids should be appreciative to have us. They have it backwards. It’s us (the parents) that are so grateful to be able to parent such wonderful kids.
Our oldest is a mature, confident toddler. Our youngest is a dynamic, energetic little toddler. They bring my heart such joy. Having the privilege to watch them laugh and play and grow and talk and eat and walk and live …. it’s amazing.
It. Is. Amazing.
I’m crying as I write this because I don’t have the words to express myself well. They are both sleeping so I’d better shut up .. Lol
They are just such wonderful beings and I’m grateful that I get to be here to see it all.
We used to rent a three bedroom, three bathroom, two story house. The house was okay but the neighbors were annoying. We wanted to move after our son’s adoption was final but we knew we wanted to adopt again and it was intimated that the wait time for licensing to come back out would be long … so we stayed.
Once you have a foster child in your home, licensing has to come back out to make sure the child is safe. A few months after we were matched with our daughter we started looking for a new house. We found a four bedroom, two bath (I know … ugh …) single story house a few blocks away.
As soon as we signed the lease we sent an email to her social worker and our adoption worker.We knew we had to update (reapply??) with licensing so we did that as well. As usual, the property management company is being a bit of a challenge. To get a letter that says that they knew we’re doing foster care at the property (I submitted our foster care paperwork when we applied AND both children are on the lease) I was told that they would have to contact their legal department and have them draft a letter. *blank stare*
Yesterday I got a call from licensing. They seemed upset that we’d applied after we moved. How could we have applied before we moved? We didn’t have access to the house? They seemed upset that we didn’t have the letter from the property management company. They said we’d need to submit the letter once we got it.
I’m wondering how big a deal this is. Are we pay-a-fine in trouble or remove-the-child in trouble?
Anyone have any idea?
Just got the news that the appeals period is over and the baby is now legally free for adoption. The next step, I think, is getting a date to finalize the adoption.
We were matched in July and it’s looking like we might be finalized by February! It’s been so long that I’ve been trying to remember how it goes: matching, placement, termination of parental rights, appeals period, sign adoption papers, get a finalization date, finalize the adoption. Whoo! It took 13 months with our son. If things keep up at this pace, it’ll be 7 months for our daughter.
She’s only been here a few months but I can’t imagine our family without her. Now it looks like I won’t have to.
I was super happy to listen to the National Awareness Adoption Month episode of the Add Water and Stir podcast about adoption. They decided to yield to the voices of 4 adoptees. I was even more thrilled to learn that two of those voices were from same-race families. Whoo hoo!
It seemed like all the families were created from domestic private adoption so I’d like to see/hear about more families created from foster care but I’ll hold on to that as a suggestion for next year’s National Adoption Awareness Month podcast.
You can listen to the whole podcast here.
Most people find it difficult to fall asleep around people you don’t feel comfortable with and/or in new situations. Our baby girl falls asleep with us, but will wake if anything changes. For example, if she falls asleep in the car she’ll immediately wake once you unclick her carseat.
Our toddler has fallen asleep in many different places (carseat, while in the mei tei, etc.) and we’re usually able to successfully transfer him to his bed. Our little girl? Ha?! As soon as she notices that something is changing, she’s up. I don’t mean she sleepily looks around and then lies her head back on your shoulder. I mean she’s UP! She’s looking. She’s talking. You can see that she’s wondering what’s going on.
This weekend we’re going to Disneyland so we’re at a hotel. We ran out to get dinner and she fell asleep on the way back. He was able to unclick her seat belt, pick her up, grab some bags, carry her to our room, and lie her down in the borrowed crib all while she slept peacefully.
I know babies sleeping in a parent’s arms isn’t a huge thing for many, but for adoptive parents the feeling can be overwhelming. By the time she was placed with us, she had lost her parents and her foster parents. We were her third family and I think anyone might concerned about new situations at this point. My guess is that she doesn’t trust new people/situations because things have changed so often for her. I applaud her willingness to put up with us. I applaud her willingness to accept our HUGE dog that’s always in the way, our toddler that’s adjusting to having a sibling and two imperfect parents that are probably making tons of mistakes along the way.
I know it’s not huge news to everyone else, but for a newly created foster-adopt family … her feeling comfortable enough to sleep is huge.
Today, she cried.
She didn’t wail.
She didn’t scream.
Today, she cried the way I’ve heard other babies cry. I was in en suite bathroom and she was in her crib. Apparently, she didn’t want to read any more books so she started crying. I was busy and used to her screeching for extended periods of time, so I said, “You’re okay mamas …. I’m right here” and then went on about my chores.
It took me a minute to realize it but she had cried for a little bit (not wailed) and then rolled over, grabbed her bottle, and went to sleep. The silence surprised me so I went to check on her. As soon as I came through the doorway, I could see her lying on her back with her bottle in her mouth and her left leg thrown over the right.
I walked closer to her crib to make sure that she really was okay. I saw her little chest rising and falling so I smiled to myself and went back to my chores. She’s been with us about three months and it seems that she may have realized that #1 she doesn’t have to screech to get our attention #2 she usually has a bottle or a pacifier nearby #3 it’s okay to just let yourself fall asleep in a cozy spot.
She’s eating yummy solids (she had Sizzler’s steak and shrimp for the first time this week), playing with her brother, learning to get out of the way of Edgar’s tail, and apparently getting comfortable with us.